I am known to be a pack mule.

Mommy's purse basically carries everything that you may ever need - from Barbie's lost pink shoe to graham crackers from three years ago that have been crushed into crumbs which are held inside plastic packaging that lies, saying it tastes delicious. No, they don't. They likely taste like stale toe jam.

Anyhow, I digress.

A few months ago, Dave and I were searching online at new products on www.Thinkgeek.com when I saw this little beauty.

I knew I HAD to have it. I proclaimed my intent to receive it on FaceBook. I called out the fact that I NEEDED it and it would be PERFECT to cart all the crap around for other people that I normally do in my purse.

Truth?

The sucker is just too big. It is the biggest messenger bag that I have EVER owned. I took it with me to church on Sunday to give it a test drive before committing to moving all the crap and crumbs over from my ChrisYulKwanzaCkah purse.

It was just too large.

And so now, I am determined to release my messenger bag back into the Wilds where --- oh feck that. I'll just wrap it up and give it to my oldest daughter who turns 14 this April, for her birthday! She was literally drooling over it when I took it out of the box anyway, so I know she'll just be jumping for absolute joy.

And for me? I bought myself at $13.00 black patent leather purse that still fits everything it did before. There's just no dancing gingerbread and holiday decor plastered all over the side of it. I even threw the graham cracker dust bag into the new purse to show I was committed to the change.

I'm such a good mom. Some days.